The air bridge is a brilliant invention. Walking from departure gate to plane without having to negotiate storms, stairs and confusing doors. And exiting the plane in a similarly civilised manner.  Some even enable you to pick up leaflets for products you’re never going to use.  Others even allow business class passengers direct access to their posh cabin without having to mingle at all with the riff raff in economy.  Who knew life as an intrepid traveller could get this exciting?

When my Wizz Air flight landed in Ljubljana they even had one connecting the front of the plane to the arrivals terminal. Alas, at the back where I was sat a stairway and bus trip awaited. Despite being just 30 yards from the terminal building the bus with no seats proceeded on a two mile trip around the airport’s preferred Tarmac routing before dropping its cargo of passengers ten feet beneath air bridge, just a few seconds stroll away from the plane and where it had commenced its journey. And a much longer queue had now materialised at passport control.

I think I prefer the Ryanair approach at Leeds which, once you’re at the bottom of the stairway getting peed on by the great British weather they allow you to walk across a zebra crossing, supervised by the ground staff, to something resembling a very long and leaky bus shelter.  Being hurled around on the seatless bus is my least preferred option.

But perhaps an international law enforcing a requirement for an air bridge at both ends of a plane preflight and post flight would be more civilised. Especially if I’m on board!

From Cow to Cone in Three Hours – Then Straight Down the Neck of a Seabird