For reasons unknown, the Australia question pretty much paused my life. I’ve sat in my room for weeks knowing it’s a bit of a mess with the view I’ll sort it when I know if I’m off to Oz or not.
Im slightly gobsmacked as to what a mess it is. This morning I’ve spent two hours on the space to the right of my bed. Filing insurance claim paperwork. Binning trips been and gone paperwork and ridding myself of other stuff.
I now have my emergency hospital bag packed too. It sits by my bed ready for a taxi or ambulance to rush me to hospital if needed. I’ve done this because the thought of having to wear a hospital gown, as I did for last week’s X-ray, is appalling. Pyjamas, two days underwear and socks and key cables for phone and iPad are in there. Together with a basic washbag. Toothpaste. Toothbrush. Deoderant.
The whole situation took me back a year. I was waiting to see an oncologist privately – he was going to tell me a diagnosis I didn’t want to hear. The thorasic surgeon didn’t want me as he knew I was inoperable. I googled lung cancer survival rates and the magic number six months kept coming up. My instinct was to organise a will and throw out my junk to minimise any work my sister and kids would have to take on when the inevitable happened. So I did.
It was a pretty thorough clearout. More severe than anything I’ve done this morning. Stuff chucked away that while I’d valued it at some stage it seemed to mean nothing in the spectre of not having a future. It was an intense day mentally that sat several weeks before I decided to quit work and live a bit.
Tomorrow I’ll do the left side of my bed. My differing flight bags sit there. Hopefully I’ll be fit enough to use them for short flights soon. A pile of business class vanity kits also sits unused. I love getting the “free stuff”. I often forget to use it. Or allocate it to a travel bag I’ve never used, I think I’ve received eight this year. And other than the lip balm in my Iberia bag, which came to my rescue in Chile’s Atacama Desert, I’ve not used anything.
Phase two tomorrow. And then the car …